Ok, I decided to make this blog, 2 joke or 1 interesting fact per day.
Or else the fun would be over fast. So stay tune for more okay..Although now only got 1 audience -.- Hope more will come to have your share of laughs in this blog :D
Escape Prison Guy
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:
"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
3 Dead Guys and a devil
Three guys were killed instantly in seperate accidents. At the gates to Heaven, they meet the Devil.
The Devil said, "Ask me any question. If I can't answer it, you go to Heaven. If not, to Hell you go!"
The first guy is a Mathematician who presented a very complicated mathematical question. In half a heartbeat, the Devil got the answer, "And to Hell you go!" The Mathematician went to hell.
The second guy is a Scholar, "Tell me of the latest teachings of Socrates." The Devil gave a full hour lecture on the teachings and the Scholar dejectedly admitted defeat. "To Hell ya go!" said the Devil and the Scholar indeed was sent to hell.
The last is a Taxi Driver, "Give me a stool and a drill." The Devil give him what he asked. The Taxi Driver drilled seven holes and let off a fart, "Which hole did I just farted though?"
The Devil thought hard and pointed to the middle hole. The Taxi Driver said, "WRONG! IT'S FROM MY A$$H*LE!"
And so, the Taxi Driver went to Heaven!
